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At times, Jay Spring believes he is “the greatest person on planet Earth”. Living with narcissistic personality disorder, his grandiose moments often turn “really delusional”, he admits. You’re riding high and you think, ‘People will see that I surpass everyone else … I’m destined for greatness for the world’.”

For Spring, these times of heightened ego are usually succeeded by a “sudden low”, a period when he feels sensitive and self-conscious about his conduct, rendering him particularly vulnerable to disapproval from others. He came to wonder he might have this personality condition after looking up his traits online – and eventually evaluated by a clinician. Yet, he questions he would have accepted the diagnosis if he hadn’t previously arrived at that realization by himself. When someone suggests to somebody that they have NPD, {they’ll probably deny it|denial is a common response|they’re likely to reject it,” he says – especially if they harbor beliefs of dominance. “They’re in a delusional world that they made for themselves. And within that framework, I’m the greatest and {nobody can question me|no one should doubt me|my authority is absolute.”

Defining Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Though people have been identified with narcissism for decades, definitions vary what people refer to as the term. “Everyone calls everybody a narcissist,” states a leading researcher, adding the word is “applied too broadly” – but when it comes to a professional assessment, he suggests many people hide it, as there is widespread prejudice around the condition. A narcissist will tend to have “an exaggerated self-image”, “difficulty understanding others’ feelings”, and “a pattern of manipulating others to enhance their social status through things like seeking admiration,” the specialist says. Those with NPD may be “highly self-focused”, to the point that {“they’re not able to hold down stable relationships|“their jobs are damaged|“they have a distorted view of reality,” he adds.

Emotional connections were never important about anyone really, so relationships weren’t a priority relationships seriously

Sex-Based Distinctions in The Disorder

While three-quarters of people identified as having the condition are men, findings indicates this figure does not mean there are a lower rate among women, but that narcissism in women is frequently manifests in the vulnerable narcissism type, which is under-identified. “Men’s narcissism tends to be somewhat tolerated, similar to everything in society,” says a 23-year-old who shares content on her dual diagnosis on online channels. It’s fairly common, the two disorders are comorbid.

First-Hand Experiences

It’s hard for me with dealing with feedback and being turned down,” she explains, “because if I hear that the problem is me, I tend to switch to a defensive state or I become unresponsive.” Even with this response – which is sometimes referred to as “narcissistic injury”, she has been attempting to address it and take advice from her loved ones, as she doesn’t want to slip into the damaging patterns of her past. “I was very emotionally abusive to my partners in my youth,” she states. With professional help, she has been able to manage her condition better, and she says she and her partner “have a dynamic where I told him, ‘If I say something messed up, if I say something manipulative, point it out {right then and there|immediately|in the moment’.”

She grew up mainly in the care of her father and says she lacked healthy examples as a child. I’ve had to teach myself all this time which behaviors are and is not appropriate to say in conflicts because I never had that growing up,” she says. Every insult was fair game when my family members were insulting me in my early years.”

Origins of NPD

These mental health issues tend to be linked to difficulties as a child. Heredity is a factor,” notes a consultant psychiatrist. But, when someone exhibits NPD characteristics, it is often “connected with that specific childhood circumstances”. Those traits were “a survival tactic in some ways to survive at a very early age”, he states, when they may have been ignored, or only shown love that was conditional on meeting particular demands. They then “persist in applying those identical strategies as adults”.

Like several of the NPD-diagnosed people, John (a pseudonym) thinks his parents “may be narcissists themselves”. The 38-year-old says when he was a child, “their needs came first and their work and their social life. So it was like, don’t bother us.” When their they engaged with him, it came in the form of “significant demands to achieve good grades and career success, he says, which made him feel that if he didn’t achieve their goals, he wasn’t “acceptable.

In adulthood, none of his relationships were successful. “I’ve never cared about anyone really,” he states. As a result, relationships weren’t relationships seriously.” He believed he wasn’t loving someone, until he met his current partner of three years, who is facing similar challenges, so, similar to his experience, struggles with emotional regulation. She is “very supportive of the internal struggles in my head”, he explains – it was surprisingly, she who originally considered he might have NPD.

Accessing Support

Following an appointment to his doctor, an assessment was arranged to a clinical psychologist for an assessment and was given the NPD label. He has been recommended for therapeutic sessions through national services (a long period of therapy is the only treatment that has been demonstrated to benefit NPD patients, experts say), but has been on the waiting list for 18 months: It was indicated it is expected around maybe February or March next year.”

Disclosure was limited to a handful of people about his mental health status, because “negative perceptions are widespread that all narcissists are abusers”, but, in his own mind, he has accepted it. This understanding allows me to understand myself better, which is positive,” he explains. Each individual have come to terms with NPD and are pursuing treatment for it – hence being willing to talk about it – which is possibly not the norm of all people with the condition. But the growth of online advocates and the expansion of online support communities point to {more narcissists|a growing number